Sometimes as a mom you just have to say yes. Certainly no is easier, more frequent, often necessary, but the moment you find yourself saying yes, your heart gets lighter.

When I decided to embark on a yes day with Emma, I did it innocently enough at first. Mostly just to see what she would actually suggest we do it if she thought I would not say no. It was upon sharing her answers with me, with their total desire essentially just equaling time together, that I knew I must actually act. Not just half listen or nod along with the usual, “We’ll see”, but I knew I had to actually make a solid plan.

And make a plan we did. I gave Emma a few days to think over what she really wanted to do, and she literally mapped out her requests.

She wanted to shop, with me, with each of us taking turns picking a store. She allowed for random stops along the way, because every good shopper knows that you must allow for the moment that something catches your eye in a store window. She called those stops “mini” shops, which just killed me in its sweetness. I wish I had a video of the quality of her voice as she would think at bedtime, night after night, about our plan. Did I like it? Was California Pizza Kitchen the best choice for lunch? Should we indulge in dessert before or after The Container Store? What would be the best way to surprise each other with little gifts as we shopped? Honestly, for my sweet girl, the planning was as good as the actual doing.

Except the actual doing turned out to be pretty amazing, too. We held hands as we walked into the mall. We talked about the upcoming school year and whether she was nervous to find out her teachers. She shared with me the ideal classmates and even shared some names of those she might wish weren’t in her class. Her face was innocent and pure and seemed to lose some of the ever-increasing self-doubt as we walked along, our map in hand, just being two ladies who were out for the day.

What really struck me half way through our day was that what we were doing was not actually monumental or amazing, because my God we were simply buying a backpack and some new tennis shoes. These are things we would have done anyway. Yet this outing was different because we were together, just the two of us, with no computer or phone to distract me. This time she got all of me. This day was special because my need to say no had melded into a desire to say yes.